The Jasons WUB: What's Under There?

Some people love these, others hate them. I can't stop the WUBS when they come. This was in my head driving to work yesterday morning. They invade me. LOL. Hope you enjoy. 

Setting: Sonny's house...on a dark and dreary night, Burton carries in Sam: 

TAKE THEM OFF! 

Carly: Oh My GOD! HOLY HELL!! Sonny..it's it's...
Sonny: Yeah, I know.
Miller: Well, I don't know...what are you doing with my face...and my wife? 
Burton: Stare blink
Carly: It's YOU! JASON!! What the what...
Burton: Stare...
Miller: Look over here pal...at ME! With my OWN FACE look at me! Let go of my wife!!
Burton: Cocks head...looks at Sonny. blinks
Miller: And don't try that damn bink stare on me!! I started that blink stare, or at least I thought I did..Damn it!! Put her down!
Sonny: Jason.. put her..on the....couch.
Carly: Ok, ok...who's who?? I mean....Sonny....???
Sonny: It's not obvious?? 
Carly: Well, ok..ok, I can tell..um...pull down your pants..
Burton: Blink...stare...
Miller: Blink...stare
Carly: Waves her hands--WELL I'll know it when I SEE IT! 
Sonny: Carly...no one is pullin' down their pants here...
Miller: Come on Sam..wake up...
Carly: Wait, should that Jason be touching her...or should that Jason be touching her?  
Sonny: That's  Jason THERE and that's NOT Jason there...
Everyone pauses and looks at each other...

Miller: Hey, you....get my tshirt off...
Burton:  Um...no. 
Miller: Sonny, tell him to take my tshirt off...
Sonny: I'm not tellin' anyone to take any shirt Or Pants off! You are all crazy...
Carly: Jason---I told you to get a tattoo that one night we were at Jake's, I TOLD YOU! 
Sonny: Yeah, a tatt would help in this situation about now....
Sam: (waking) Um...Jason....? No wait.. Jason?? (Passes out) 
Miller: Look, we have to do something because all my clothes have "Jason Morgan" labels sewn on now...I'm not taking them off.
Carly: Seriously? Jason Morgan labels? 
Miller: Elizabeth did it for me...but don't tell Sam...
Burton: you have underwear labels? (smirk)
Carly: HEY! I know...I know...boxers or briefs? You first..
Miller: Boxers
Burton: Come on...
Carly: HA!! SEE JASON DOESN'T WEAR UNDERWEAR!! BOOM!!! DID IT!  Com-MAN-do. Totally. Jason--that's Jason. 
Burton: Stare.  Nod. 
Miller: Oh hell... whatever. I don't even care. I can NOT wear underwear too you know. But I chafe. 
Sonny: rolls eyes...ok... here we go.. I'm taking Sam to the hospital. You two stay here and work this out. 
Carly: Oh Squee!!  :claps hands: I can't wait until you braid my hair! AND I have about 700 photos to go through with you...and oh my god, Josslyn is such a bitch right now. Did you know that we found out who gave her her kidney? She's this awful girl who...(rambles on in the background) 
Miller: Hey...
Burton: yeah?
Miller: wanna sneak out of here while she's yapping and grab a beer? 
Burton: um...blink. Do we like beer? 
Miller: I dunno but I'm not listening to this much longer...
Carly: Oh! And what else...Spinelli moved with Ellie to raise Georgie and ...oh! We had a serial killer and...
Burton: Come on. this way...
Miller: Shhhh.
Burton: Oh she can't hear you..believe me.