Thursday, February 5, 2015

Sonny, Disney Princess WUB



Setting: Docks at night... 10 degrees F... windchill 2. 
Carly: OMG...Michael there you are..
Michael: Yeah, I'm here
Carly: What? Who? What happened?
Michael: Well, there was a bomb...I was carrying it and..and..
Carly: And? Did you just HAND IT OFF to the father you hate? To blow up?
Michael: No..no...sniff..he, took it out of my hands..
Carly: Then what!? He threw it right?
Michael: Well..no..he took about 5 steps and jumped.
Carly: Wait. (Hand up) He jumped WITH THE BOMB. Even though it was the water..  where he could THROW It?
Michael:  You don't understand, he flew..flew like a great seahawk over the lake and....oh, my God. The last thing he said to me was "I love you"
Carly: Did he say he loved ME?
Michael: (Stare, blink).. um... you? um..no... 
Carly: He didn't mention that skank Brenda did he? 
Michael: NO..no... just me. Oh..(crying) I mean, here I hated him and he's a hero and now he's dead!
Carly: (slaps him) Shut up! He's not dead, Michael! I saw him sign his contract...he's not.
Michael: Oh my God..
Rescuer 1: (straining noises) hmmff...uh..who knew fully clothed bodies left in a freezing lake could be so heavy?
Rescuer 2: Got a pulse?
Resuer: Dunno.. I mean his eyes are shut... so...
Rescuer 1: Welp. That's that. Sorry lady, he's dead...
Recuer 2:  Coffee?
Rescuer   1: I'm buyin...come on.. someone will pick this stiff up later..

Carly: OMG!! Sonny! (kneels down) SONNY! Oh.oh...
Michael: DAD! I mean...ok, whatever..DAD!
Carly: Come on...here..count..1, 2.... pump.. 3...4... breathe
Michael: Mom, they said he's dead..
Carly: NO! I'm telling you, he's not dead...
Michael: Ok, ok... pump...beat chest..pump..
Carly: Oh Sonny..pleaaaaaaseeeeeeeee. Pleassssssssse...
:Docks get eerily quiet...a tiny light glows above Sonny's head...." 
Michael: Tink? Is that you? 
Tink: Sprinkles dust
Carly: Kisses Sonny...
Michael: Mom I think I saw..
Carly:  SHUT IT! Wake up my prince..
:dramatic pause on Sonny's face"
Sonny: :cough...cough...:  :seaweed out of mouth:
Carly: You are alive!  Praise Neptune! 
Michael: Tink did it Mom..
Sonny: Carly? Michael ? is that yous? I ..I...is everyone safe? Did I save the boat from Captain Hook's evil bomb?
Carly: :sobbing: Yes, Yes YES... you did! MY HERO!!! 
Sonny: Aw, sucks wasn't anything. Blushes beneath the blue from frost bite


paying TRIBUTE! 

Later that week: The village comes out to pay tribute to Sonny. "ALL HAIL SONNY"!! hats in the air...
Hip HIP HOORAY!!! 

Mayor: I declare today, Sonny Corinthos day and forever forward, Pier 52 will be named Corinthos Walk to honor our exceptional citizen! And, by the way? that peskie murder charge? Pfft. Gov. Cuomo called and is totally on board to drop that sheeze. 
Valentini: Wait! Wait! I have another announcement to make... we are naming the SHOW after our Dimpled Don... henceforth to be known as "Corinthos MobularHospital"!! 
Crowd cheers. 
Sonny flashes dimples. Close-up


END 



**Note: except for a few tweaks, this is just how it happened today. 

6 comments:

  1. ROFL! I love it!!!! :) So perfect! Yes exactly what happened!!! :) Especially this,

    "Carly: Did he say he loved ME?
    Michael: (Stare, blink).. um... you? um..no...
    Carly: He didn't mention that skank Brenda did he?
    Michael: NO..no... just me. Oh..(crying) I mean, here I hated him and he's a hero and now he's dead!
    Carly: (slaps him) Shut up! He's not dead, Michael! I saw him sign his contract...he's not."

    ROFL!

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  2. made me squirt milk out of my nose, this is very funny.

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  3. Several years ago a link to one of your Wubs is what led me to your site. You write better than the GH writers!

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  4. Panda, I have WUBS going back 13 years!! I've slowed down in the last few though. Thx

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  5. LMAO that was the funniest thing I've read in a long time

    ReplyDelete

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