Saturday, March 26, 2011

Wubs Net Interviews: Dr. Lisa Niles !!

Truth be told, we were hesitant to interview the somewhat "peculiar" mistress of medical healing, but we were pleasantly surprised to find her to be funny, insightful and charming. Ok, maybe charming in the cray-cray sense. Just wish she would have left my napkin holder alone.

 Dr. Niles took the time out from her busy rotation to visit Casa D'WubsNet!



Wubsnet: Welcome!!  How did you get here tonight?

Lisa: I drove...I drove really fast. Behind Robin..er.. I mean, I drove here not stalking anyone. Yeah. All alone.

Wubsnet: Interesting... You've been in Port Charles for quite some time now, how do you like the city? 

Lisa: Well, besides the sidewalk outside Patrick's house, it's pretty great. Love Jake's....yeah. Cool place. I really like the gum under the tables. Pretty fresh, you know? Oh..and I like the darts. Cause I can pretend that Robin's face is right there in the middle. BIG AND FAT...right in the middle. Yep. Right there.


Wubsnet: Um, you're pointing at my wall clock. 


Lisa: Wall clock, Robin's ugly gross face...what's the difference?? Hey, that napkin holder looks like her big butt too. HAHAHHAAA! 

Wubsnet: Wow...Hey, you know,  everyone on the internet is dying to know your hair secret. It always looks so...so...


Lisa:  Straight? Shiny? Manageable? You know....I do it myself.  Don't tell the make-up department  though, they get really crabby and tell me I should like, shampoo it. Now, how stupid is that? Like I wouldn't clean my hair.  I use a combo-shampoo leave -n conditioner. Saves time when I'm waiting for Patrick to 'accidentally" see me step out of the shower. :giggle:

Wubsnet: So, tell me about Johnny. You two seem really into each other...

Lisa: Who told you that? Did he tell you that? Because, come on...we've only done it on the couch and everyone knows that if you don't do it in a bed, it like doesn't count. Plus the fact I've always kept my bra on. You want to see it? It's really pretty...it's pink and...

Wubsnet: No, thanks, I watch the show. Let's talk about your future. You've drugged Robin, given her the wrong HIV medication, thrown her in a well, boiled her daughter's bunny...

Lisa: Uh, hello..I did save her from a fire...I'm not totally heartless. 

Wubsnet:  Yes, you did do that. Does this mean you're giving up? I mean now that Patrick and Robin are back together? 

Lisa: What! Who told you that? They are NOT BACK TOGETHER! . Geesh..they are SO NOT!! I imported a hot guy to come on to her but she's such a freekin' ice-bitch it didn't work. Bitch.  Patrick loves ME. You know we used to play beer pong back in college and make out while I wore his NASCAR shirt. 

Wubsnet: Nice visual there...well, unless there's anything else, I'd like to say thank you for coming in and...


Lisa: Hey! Is that a tape recorder? Is it? What in the hell... I never said anything you thought I said. Even if you think you did. So..forget about trying to make me look bad. Give me that tape. Give it to me! I'm going to destroy it. Or...walk around with it for weeks and look at it. STARE AT IT. yeah. Don't think you can trap me, because you can't. OH, and I'm taking this napkin holder that looks like Robin's butt. So there.

Wubsnet: Ok, well..see ya..don't hit my...  oh-- you hit my tree on the way out. Nice. 

Lisa: :screams from car: And I DIDN'T HIT THAT TREE! It moved! Right INTO MY CAR! I'll be suing you!! (plays "Hungry Like The Wolf" really loudly on her car stereo as she peels down the street)


all rights reserved wubsnet 2011
 

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I really have nothing to say but I am LOL it was so good

kdmask said...

thank you Mr. Anonymous.

sonya said...

Hahaha! Oh come on Karen you did not really interview her did you? You made all this up! ROFL!

Cammie said...

Fun stuff. Lisa definitely is cray-cray.

Barb said...

Why they haven't hired you to write GH . . . or 30 Rock . . I don't know. After all these years, all the ORIGINAL "wubs" etc. you come up with is amazing.

Anonymous said...

LOL LOL LOL

Anonymous said...

That was...er..."entertaining". Yeah, that's it! lol

kdmask said...

Sonya, "Lisa" was totally sitting here when I wrote that :)

Lori said...

Oh Karen, what kind of trouble do you get into when I go away for a few days? lol

Promise me you will not interview Dr Cray Cray again without back up ;)