Sunday, July 10, 2011

Sunday Surgery: Guza's Parting Shots

 Oh we're not rid of our Mr. Guza yet! It's coming Wubbers, it's coming...but until then it seems we are paying the piper in some classic Guza "storytelling".



Villianize those characters before disposing of them.  Mr. G's opus operandi  is either to totally forget a character exists (Terrell, Matt, Kate.....the list goes on and on) OR to make them so unlikeable you are ready to shove them right out the door. (Ric, AJ) and now Jax. Yes, I know there are those of you out there that don't like him anyway but you have to admit the shoddy writing he's gotten is horrific lately. First he was gone forever even when Josslyn had cancer, and now he's like a vindictive little shrew. So..string him up on a meat hook and let him swing. Or, of course, the hooker/drug set up works as well. 





Write a Character off in 3.5 seconds. You know Skye comes, goes...Holly, Ric, Monica, Audrey-- just about any character gets a bad send off (or none at all). Nikolas talks to his brother, old lover and Dead Love Emily--but never even thinks about his sister, or his AUNT and her children. How long would that have taken? An hour of taping? 20 minutes? Hey, who cares he's only been on the show for a decade plus. 



Fires: We all know that Guza loves his pyrotechnics. I can't name ALL the fires but we know he's destroyed at least Luke's Blues Club, The Webber-Scorpio house, the old hospital set and now, the Spencer house. I personally think that's how he feels about GH of 'golden days" and those fans who held Luke and Laura dear, but heck, that's just me. Fire, bombs... the works. Thank you for yet another smoke filled afternoon!



Women in Fredrick's of Hollywood: (For those of you under a certain age, that means a little racier than Victoria's Secret). We got that this this past week or what! WOW! There's Lulu, parading around in an outfit that well...Sam usually gets blessed with.  She had a nice pink number (up there, backside even) and a lovely black and gray one.  Of course, women are to be used at sex objects so Lulu HAS to work "undercover" at some brothel to 'find her father'. Uh, sorry, we know this is just an excuse for the lingerie fetish.


Character Flip-Flop: Out of the blue, after not writing for a character for awhile... all of a sudden they appear and act totally the opposite. The latest? Alexis..who up until this moment has thought that Sonny and his gangstah ways is nothing but a unsafe murder-trap for she and her family. She also hates Carly with a passion. So now (in addition to wearing some really bad clothes) she's all of a sudden totally on Carly's side and willing to throw Jax under the bus. Uh...ok 





One Note-Villians: Well, we KNOW that This has taken over Guza's life for the past umpteen years.  Faison, The Balkan... Stavros..and even my beloved Helena are often reduced to little more than comic book characters.  I can't even remember that Russian guy's name that was on the boat. Our latest is Anthony Zacchara whom I LOVE but who is quickly becoming the same crazy-flower-loving dude that just won't quit. Helena better get some decent stuff under GW--her little "visit" with Lucky sounded like the other `1,000 visits she's had in the past. 



Terrorizing Children: You know and I know it...our fearless headwriter is in giddy LOVE with this. Yes, they do it on other soaps but none better than bullet in the head or run-em down G-man. The latest has been poor Alec who now only heard his Grandma in the line of fire but recently got a nice machine-gun salute of his in the same car.




Focus on ONE Character so much you could throw a fryin' pan at them. 'Nuff said


AND I don't know WHAT the hell to say to this...other than the ACCENTS he cooks up are just making me insane:
Enough Already 
SOOooooooooooo, coming soon, around July 25th, we are supposedly seeing our first "Guza-Free" scripts. Dare we hope they spend more on hospital consultants than bullets? Oh, yes...please. 


Scene of the Week: Sam and Maxie...loved Maxie telling her to basically shut up, get married and have a baby! LOL (slim pick'ins this week folks) 

See what pet you chose for Helena on the Wubs Net and vote in this week's fun poll: Bring a character over from another ABC Soap!! 

25 comments:

  1. Wow, Karen. You hit the hammer on the head in this Sunday Surgery. Everyting I was thinking was wrong with this show right now.
    I am marking my calendar for July 25th right now to see if I notice any new changes.
    My scene of the week was Robin getting Chief of Staff. I felt bad for Steve, but it was nice to see the rivalry between Robin and Patrick again. I do like Maxie and Sam together, but I am getting so sick of Sam just talking about pregnancy, marriage, and Jason, Jason, Jason. Geez, give that poor character a life! She used to be a schemer and fighter when she first came on and now she is sitting on Jason's hip.

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  2. Let's bring spoiled, self centered Sammy over from Days to match up with spoiled, self centered Carley...and let the fur fly! and the games begin!

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  3. Let's bring spoiled, self centered Sammy over from Days to match up with spoiled, self centered Carley...and let the fur fly! and the games begin!

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  4. oops, sorry...i'd erase that 2nd post if i knew how...

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  5. I'm finally hopeful for GH again. I'll tune back in next month and see if there are any real improvements. In the meantime, I'll continue to read your blog. It's the only GH fix I've gotten in about six months.

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  6. I agree with Andrea. Maybe GW can show Jasam being a couple AND Sam having a life outside of that damn couch.

    I am so done with Carly. My heart goes out to Jax. He wanted a baby for so long and he got a 2 for 1 with Morgan & Joss. Now he'll get neither. There isn't anyone in the worls who wouldn't fight hard to keep their kids from people like Jason, Sonny & Co. Yes they're making him look stupid but really think about how you would feel! I can;t wait for him to take Brenda away from Sonny even though I'm guessing it won't be romantic. But it will be nice to think about Jax raising Sonny's baby afterall if rumors are true that brenda is PG.

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  7. characters to bring from OLTL how about Bo to show Mac how to run a cop shop, and send Steve to Llandview hospital to show them how to run a hospital and perhaps teach some of the dr's there some people skills?
    GH really needs a matriach so of course Viki! Her unconditional love for all would be of so much use in Port Charles...and John, Please bring him to PC to get him away from Nat....pair him up with anyone who isnt her!!!

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  8. Bring back Spinelli, this Jackel PI is driving me nuts, along with Lulu and Dante, hope she doesn't keep "working" till TG is back from vacation. Can't wait for the new writers to come on and Guza gone. I still DVR GH, but fast forward or delete most of the show. Thanks for your updates Karen, I can skip the schlock.

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  9. I loved the Maxie/Sam scene too. It finally showed Sam out of that damn penthouse. Anyone else miss when she actually had a life outside of Jason?

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  10. Sami from Days!! Great idea Leesy! Her vs. Carly would be my ideal pairing!!

    I also agree with all of what Andrea said and Hope. Have Bo come and show Mac how to run a Police Station. Brilliant!!!

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  11. I would have included OTHER soaps besides ABC..but I don't watch them sorry!!

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  12. Yes yes I am sick of Sam in that dumb penthouse. I'm so sick of Jason &his BS period it makes me tired of seeing kemo too who normally was a fav for me.

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  13. Karen, the picture from yesterday of the blonde woman and young man, who are they? (Usually you caption the photos, so should I know who they are?

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  14. So sounds like most if not all of us are sick of Carly, Jasam's boring conversations & some of the stupid Lulu stuff we've had to endure. If Liz had been more mean to Red earlier it would be easier to buy red's accusations. And did Red every tell Lucky she knew Aiden was his or did I miss it?

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  15. AntJoan, they are Roxy and Rex from One Life to Live!

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  16. Oh, thanks Karen, that explains why I didn't know who they are.

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  17. I am sorry, but there is nothing exciting about this show right now. I am not a fan of jasam at all, Lulu story is ridiculous, and Liz and jax are destroyed for the promotion of the usual characters.

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  18. Yes, they should bring John over from OLTL. Since he started out in Port Charles with Monaco, it would be fun to see them together again. :)

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  19. We get upset when they bring on newbies yet continue to neglect current characters already on the show. How is bringing over an actor/character from another show any better?

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  20. Anon 1:03 am: AMEN!

    I also agree with you Frisco. Although they may be good actors from OLTL, doesn't mean the writing would be good for them on GH.

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  21. Frisco, it was a joke-- I had to have SOMETHING for the poll this week.

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  22. So grateful someone else thinks jax is just doing what any parent would do...oh except carly. GH needs to stop making sonny and jason heros. At the end of the day they are lying criminals.

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  23. I agree about Hells. The Guza stuff was like a broken record, so I hope Garin Wolf takes her in a different direction.

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  24. Thanks for this article, pretty helpful piece of writing.

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  25. Oh my god, there's so much effective information above!

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